Some guys have a fear of commitment..

They are the source of countless magazine articles, jokes, jabs and cry fests..we are taught by our mothers and gal pals how to avoid those wastes of our time.

You can't be in a relationship, where your doing all the work, constantly trying to make ends meet,and the other person doesn't feel the same way about you.

It's one sided.

You know where I'm going with this don't you? You see what I'm building to?

Derby girl wannabe's. They are just like guys with commitment issues.You do all the work. They let you down, they make promises they don't intend to keep....

I let my team pick my topic this week..this is what they chose.

Excuse me while I get up on my soapbox for a bit. (yeah so now I'm like 6ft8)

I've been told before, that everybody has a place in derby, even the girls that just wanna wear the cute clothes and promote, but don't want to skate. Now while I agree with that, what I don't agree with, is having a group of girls, who have their sweat equity in a team, drop their lives, leave their kids and their significant others at home 3 to 4 times a week to come together to form a cohesive team that kicks ass, be disrupted constantly by the girls with commitment issues.

Explanation? So you come to practice once a week instead of the 3 times we do. Or out of 3 weeks we see your smiling face 1 time, What does that do for us as a team? We learn to skate as a fluid unit, we learn each others movements and abilities. We are a solid team. Then you come in.. your out of shape, your winded, when you trip up you trip everybody else up. Honestly, it is a pure lack of courtesy and disrespect to your teammates. It is as if your saying "I can do whatever I want, I'm an entitled special snowflake." It's like your flipping the bird to our sacrifices away from our own family and personal life for this sport we call derby.

You cant show a pure lack of commitment, show up when you feel like it, be out of shape, screw everybody up and parade around in your jersey and say your a derby girl.That really makes you nothing but a casual skater who happens to have one of our shirts. That makes you a fan. Not a derby girl.

While we all understand family takes priority, it's hard to take someone seriously when their MySpace and Facebook statuses for weeks and days go on about their exploits, and when their having the time of their lives or being comical while we all are busting our asses then stroll in for one practice and bitch about how hard it is, sorry doll, it's hard to feel pity for you.

We don't have time for it, and we don't need it. Join Curves for Women if your fond of female sport interaction in a circular pattern, not derby.

You have to ask yourself..is this what I want in my life? Is this what I want for myself? Because derby isn't just about putting on the skates and the jersey and sneering in front of a camera. It's also about committing yourself to off skate endurance training, good eating habits, and for hell and be damned SHOW UP TO PRACTICE!!

If you can do all of these things, and you decide to make that sort of inner sacrifice and inner commitment, then your ready to be an effective player for your team. For me, on my last team the last 3 months, I never wore my jersey. I made every practice, But never wore my jersey. I wasn't committed to them anymore, and I felt I didn't deserve to wear that jersey. ( I guess that was my own way of telling myself it's time to roll out, just didn't listen.) Now, I wear a version of a GCRG T-shirt/jersey EVERYWHERE. I got out of shape because I lacked commitment when I left my other team. Now I watch what I eat, and I'm trying to get back into a regimented workout program.

Why?

Because I don't want to be a wannabe.. I wanna be that back wall of a blocker your not gonna get past..Once I honestly asked myself the question of "How would my life be without derby" I was not pleased with the answer.. I reached a level of inner commitment, that frankly, is kicking my ass. Sometimes, like tonight, I wonder what the hell have I gotten myself into? My coach discovered the secret to my excessively slow skating. I always assumed it was my fear of falling because I injured myself. No. I fall all the time without pads and I think it's funny.
My problem is it takes me way longer than 3 seconds to get back up. I'm like a big knuckled clumsy gorilla. So I skate slow so I wont fall, and nobody will see me McGilla Gorilla it.So as everybody else enjoyed their sprints and queen of the rink and jams and such tonight, I spent the entire practice going up and down the side of the rink throwing myself down, and getting back up. Did I cry? Yes, Because my leg muscles hated me. Would it have been way easier to say screw this, and just be a ref who doesn't have to skate fast? Yes. So why didn't I give up? Because I am committed to being valuable to my team. I am committed to myself. I will be there every practice. Even though the apparent plan is for me to be throwing myself down for the next 2 weeks...I will be there.

It frikkin SUCKS!!!

But, I won't bitch about it, I will suck it up and put on my big girl booty shorts..because this is a commitment I am determined to see through.

And judging by the topic my team mates were so adamant I blog about today, I am not the only one with a rock solid commitment to derby and this team..

"There is no glory in practice, but without practice there is no glory."

BUT YOU GET NO GLORY AT ALL IF YOU DON'T SHOW UP !!!!

(This is a universal problem that spans all derby teams. It's not singling any one particular person out on my team per se, but it is meant as a blanket statement, a reality slap if you will, to anybody who shows up when they feel like it..your doing your team no good. There is no I in Team.)